Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Lesser

I just removed two of my favorite designer blogs from my Feedly.  It's been coming for a while.  Design blogs used to be the average person (like me!) who likes to decorate their house and wants to share their choices and progress.  But it's not like that anymore.  It's just about making money and I'm over it.

It just feels weird to stop reading a couple of people who you once really adored.  They were like your favorite, you got so many ideas... blogging has really changed.

I think about my blog all the time, which is funny because obviously I never write here.  I always think to myself, just write for yourself, write what you want to write about and stop worrying who's reading it or the insignificance of it.

I have to admit, now that I know I'm living my life without being a mom, I feel a little lesser, a little what to do with myself, a little what matters now, what's important now.  It's a weird feeling to chase something for so long and then it's gone.  The "now what" is taking longer than I thought it would.

I think about all my friend moms on Facebook, they never post anything if it doesn't have to do with their kids.  So you can see how not having kids throws a huge wrench in what the hell am I supposed to write about because that's what everyone my age does.

And yet I still want to write here.  Write somewhere.

Sigh.